Markiplier/Quotes
Quotes *"Hello!" ''- Noticing a new presence'' *"So... what about that?" ''- Questioning events'' *"Bing-bong! Bring it on!" - Fatal taunts, ''SCP: Containment Breach *"Looking for the fastest time? Well, look no further than me, Markiplier, the greatest bottle-runner EVER!" ''- Self-entitlement, Happy Wheels Highlights #54'' *"Excuse me? 'SCUSE ME?!" ''- Showing extreme confusion or fear in situations'' *"Squeeeeeeeeeaaak!" ''- Opening a squeaky door'' *"To infini-nope and beyond." - Nope-ing out, ''Steve's Office *"Ho-ho-holy hell!" - As Santa Claus,' Happy Wheels Highlights'' *"Jingle balls, jingle balls, harpoons up my ass!" - As Santa Claus, ''Happy Wheels Highlights #26'' *"Hjababujajebaba!!" - ''"Shuffling" through a dense forest; christened "The Mumble Dance" by many Markiplites, 'Knock Knock *"Can we do it? No we can't! ...Maybe. I don't know, I'm not very committed to this decision, but whatever." - Indecisiveness, ''Knock Knock *"THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID!" - Recurring innuendo joke *"I want to dance like an epileptic squid on acid." - On drugs, ''Death Dice Overdose *"F you in the A and have a nice day!" - Preceding the outro; sometimes used as an alternate closer *"SHUT UP NURSE! I KNOW WHAT'S BEST!" - Berating the nurse (his mother), ''Surgeon Simulator 2013 *"Holy balls!" -'' Recurring exclamation'' *"OH MY NARDS!" - Recurring exclamation after genital harm' *"Oh my God, I am tripping balls right now!" - ''Mark while dosed up on cold medicine, '''XCVB' *"That's seven, now I just need to find one more and then open the door, get on the floor, everybody do the dinosaur!" - ''Two pages to victory, ''Slender: The Nine Pages *"Balls to the wall!" - Evading SCP-173, ''SCP Containment Breach *"I'm back at the red dildo! AGAIN!" - Rediscovering the giant silo, ''Slender *"Stork flies out of your vagina? Isn't that how it works? Just, "BWAKAAAAW!!!" and then all the sudden you had a baby! And a stork. Better feed that stork." - About birth, ''Ildefonse | Part 2 *"What rhymes with axe? MORE axe!" - Butchering a body, ''Nightmare House 2 *"Fwiffwow!" - Guaranteed monster evasion technique *"One thing that I liked about being a bartender: if you make people laugh, you get better tips but you will never have better tips than the girl besides you with giant boobs ... I can make people laugh but God-damn I sure wish I had boobs... you can quote me on that" - Reminiscing his former bartender job, ''Ominous *"He is going to nibble on your giblets!" - Describing the motives of every horrific creature in existence *"Don't be nibblin' on my giblets." - Mark's request for every horrific creature in existence *"WHEEEERE'S THE BLAAACKSMIIIITH?!?" - Mark's troubles, ''Eleusis *"Let me AXE you a question" - Several bad puns later, ''Nightmare House2 *"I mean what's there to know? Comes out of the vagina like WHOOM BANG! Suddenly you got a baby!" - As if it were obvious, ''Ildefonse | Part 2 *"Let me just hump this until it makes seeeeeense!" - As Santa Claus, '''Happy Wheels Highlights' *"So its da puun run!" - ''Every harpoon run, ''Happy Wheels Highlights *"POOF! :3" - Shooting a flare, ''Toward The Light *"F*CK!" ''- Following the destruction of the Crashy McSplodey, Kerbal Space Program'' *"DAMMIT WADE, I'M IN A HUMAN-DINOSAUR ROMANTIC SITUATION!!!" ''- Berating Wade in the midst of a prehistoric date, Jurassic Heart'' *"EVERYBODY DO THE DINOSAUR!" ''- Recurring exclamation'' *"HAAA-BERSKY" ''- Flipping a lever, pressing a button'' *"I dunno if that's Masky or not but i'm just gonna call him the Lil' Douchebag!" - About Kate, ''Slender: The Arrival *"No, thank you! I don't want any!" ''- Starting to lose confidence'' *"Shut up, nurse! I'm a doctor, of course I know what is best!" - Berating the nurse, ''Surgeon Simulator 2013 *"Ding-dong, damn it!" -'' (Source needed)'' *"Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why...? So many times I ask this question... why?" - Why?, '(Source needed)'' *"Apparently the mechanics of this game is that you need to recharge your lantern, so... GUH-reat, that makes total sense."'' - Questioning logic, '''Segatakai'' *"Nope, nope, nope"'' - Recurring exclamation; continues for as long as panic ensues'' *"HEY SLENDY! YOU'RE AN A-HOLE! YOU'RE AN ASS!" ''- Foolishly taunting the Slender Man, Slender: The Arrival' *"Little piggy, no no! Little piggy, go home!" ''- Attempting to ward off Chris Walker, '''Outlast *"I'm just the greatest! And the smartest, the bravest, and the handsomest!" ''- Over-confident boasts, often preceding an embarrassing failure'' *"Helloooo, baaaayby! How YOU doin'?" - Flirtyplier, flirting with angel statues, '''Amnesia: The Dark Descent' *"Let's just nope off to Fuckthatville!" ''- Dying inside, Amnesia: A Machine For Pigs *"To be or not to F*** OFF!" ''- Moment of Shakespearean goodness, Amnesia: A Machine For Pigs' *"GET IN THE HOOOOOLE!" -'' As Santa Claus,''' Happy Wheels Highlights *"Hello? Anyone else want to dance? ...I'm great at the tango! ...And the macarena!" ''- Over-estimating his abilities, Dead Space 3'' *"Hello everybody! My name is Markiplier and welcome to Lets Play...."' '''- Mark's introduction'' *"And as always, I will SEE YOU... in the next video! Buh-bye!"' '''- Mark's outro'' *"Markiplier Out!" ''- Mark's old outro quote'' *"WHERE THE F*CK IS JOHN KEITH?" ''- Questioning John Keith's whereabouts, The Crooked Man'' *"Why are there nipple penises?" - Shocked at Goku's makeover, ''Drunk Minecraft | GOKU'S NIPPLES *"You sunuva bitch" ''- Recurring stressed exclamation'' *"Little bastard kiddies" ''- Berating the elves, Santa's Rampage'' *"YOU GO TO HELL AND YOU DIE!" ''- Damning every monstrosity to hell where they belong'' *"It's so weird!" ''- Noting uniqueness'' *"I knew they would stab me in the back... I'll just have to stab them in the back... I'll stab them in the butt... That's what I'll do..." - About his traitorous 'friends', ''EVERYTHING GOES WRONG | Nether Gameplay #2 *"Thor! I told thee to calm thine tits! Thine tits are very rambunctious." ''- Trying to calm the thunderous storm, (Source needed)'' *"EW, YOU'RE SO WEIRD." -'' Trying to evade a blindfolded/gagged prisoner in a straitjacket'' *"Do it. I am Cornholio." ''- Being threatening under a new alias, Turbo Dismount | BOB THE RAGDOLL'' *"Double-Finger Defense!" - A call-out for his main form of defense, Amnesia: When Life No Longer Exists | Part 2 | DOUBLE-FINGER DEFENSE *"I'm going to shove this ball so far up your ass your gonna be coughing up green." - Making cringe-worthy threats, '''Tenebris Lake | Part 6 | EASTER EGG' *"NO THANK YOU." ''- Rejected, '''Dungeon Nightmares' *"Let a gentleman show you-- FUCK." - ''Failing mid-sentence, Flappy Fedora: EUPHORIA OVERLOAD *"You need a glass o' water?"'' - Confused and not understanding of the term "dead"'' *"I just got more RAM installed. High-five for me. Aaanyone? Aaanyone?" - Self-congratulations from Mark- Bot, '''Two Idiots Play Starcraft | PUSH IT TO THE LIMIT (2012 livestream)' *"Do you think... do you think Kelsey would date a robot?" "''She's married..." "You're right. WHAat a bitch." -'' Mark-Bot referencing Five Second Films, Two Idiots Play Starcraft | PUSH IT TO THE LIMIT (2012 livestream)' *"I am a Bro-bot. Let's get some bitches, and go out to the bar." ''- Mark-Bot the Bro-Bot, '''Two Idiots Play Starcraft | PUSH IT TO THE LIMIT (2012 livestream) *"A robot has mechanical balls because it is there for you to suck."'' - The Swedish robot's logic on the existence of robotic gonads, Two Idiots Play Starcraft | PUSH IT TO THE LIMIT (2012 livestream)' *"I am a man! ...aaAAAAHHH NOO!" ''- Quickly proving his claim wrong, '''Slenderman (Original Game) *"I don't LIKE this game, but I know how to beat it." ''- Seconds from near-disaster, SCP: Containment Breach | Part 10 | WORST SCARE EVER'' *"Oh... YEAH! I made it through one room..." ''- Seconds from death, SCP: Containment Breach'' *"...OH F*CK YOU! OH GOD, WHAT THE F*CK! ...What the f*ck, okay?! NOT okay! I was just... listening to a nice conversation! ...Noo, you cannot change RULES!" ''- After sighting Golden Freddy,' WAS THAT GOLDEN FREDDY?! | Five Nights at Freddy's - Part 2'''